Happiness shining through

I was speaking to my cousin this morning. She says she can see on my face that I’m happy. That I look like I’ve shed years. But she is not the only one, I visited the chiropractor yesterday. It was my first visit in over 2 months, and she said that happiness is agreeing with me and my body is proof of it. Now considering that for years I have been going to her, usually once a month, sometimes for months on end it becomes twice a month. So this is a refreshing change.

My cousin was also speaking about how people change when they are truly happy. That you see changes in personality. People becoming more extrovert, interactive and pleasant to be with. And that she sees this within me. and that its difficult not to see and equally difficult to hide. Because it’s not a facade. Its more a look in your eyes and radiance coming from within. And that she is seeing it now in me.

And yes, I will be the first to agree, I am happier. I am healthier. I am getting there, overcoming the challenges that are in my path. Slowly progress is being made. and with each step I take it is progress. And yes, I have shed: I shed the baggage I was carrying, gift wrapped it and sent it away into the oblivion. I don’t need it no more. There is no space for me to carry it arround with me. I am happy here.

I know I am loved. I am discovering a whole new set of feelings, emotions, freedom that comes with being loved, feeling treasured, being carried and being held. The security. The warmth. The love. The care. The beauty. I am loved.

I didn’t know that happiness can have such an impact on my life. I wonder was I ever truly happy before?

So does that take away from me, from where I am now? No in fact it gives me more. It gives me so much that I didn’t have before. because I am so much stronger. Much more confidant. Much more self-assured.

The amazing thing is that although I was striving for self-improvement, for finding myself, for traveling into a better place, away from negativity of my past, rebonding with friends and improving relationships in my life and so much more, I never expected to find what I have now in such a short period where I have. That just makes it all the more beautiful and precious. An oyster which I now nurture with loving care.

And it spills over. So in return I give. I try to return the love, the support, the care, the warmth that I get. but I don’t give because I get. I give because I want to give. Because it comes  from within which just makes it so much more real. It comes from the depth of my soul. I cannot help it coming out and wanting to share it. And it doesn’t only go to those who gives it to me. It spills into all my life and wherever I am and whoever I am with. But it’s not a conscious effort of trying to be happy either. Its more that after looking back at a day I just went through, I realise that I am happy. Happy to be here. Happy to feel. Happy to love. Happy to share.

As long as there is someone there to share it with.

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